Why Your Perfectionism is Holding You Back – And How to Break the Cycle
Perfectionism is often praised as a desirable trait, especially in the professional world. After all, who wouldn’t want to be seen as someone who consistently delivers flawless work, who goes above and beyond in every task, and who never settles for anything less than the best? However, as I’ve learned through my own journey, perfectionism is a double-edged sword. While it can drive you to excel, it can also be the very thing that holds you back.
The Allure of Perfectionism
Perfectionism can feel like a badge of honour. It’s rooted in a desire to be the best, to avoid mistakes, and to present an image of competence and excellence. In the workplace, this can translate into meticulous attention to detail, a tireless work ethic, and an unrelenting pursuit of high standards.
For much of my career, I viewed my perfectionism as a cornerstone of my success. I believed that by holding myself to the highest possible standards, I could avoid criticism, maintain a reputation for excellence and consistently deliver exceptional work. I took pride in going over every detail, working all hours to ensure deals went through, and pushing myself to go above and beyond. At first, this drive for perfection felt like a strength. But over time, I started to notice the hidden flaws in this approach.
The Hidden Costs of Perfectionism
Perfectionism often stems from a fear of failure, childhood trauma or a deep-seated need for approval. As a perfectionist, you might spend hours obsessing over minor details, reworking presentations to the point of diminishing returns, or avoiding delegation because you’re convinced no one can do the job as well as you can. While these behaviours might lead to short-term gains, they can have significant long-term costs.
Burnout
The constant pressure to perform at an unattainable level is exhausting. As a perfectionist, you’re never satisfied, no matter how well you’ve done. This relentless pursuit can lead to burnout, where your passion for your work starts to fade, and your productivity declines. I’ve been there – working late nights, sacrificing personal time, and feeling perpetually stressed. It’s not sustainable, and it’s certainly not conducive to a healthy work-life balance.
Creativity Blocker
Perfectionism often kills creativity. When you’re obsessed with getting everything right, you become risk averse. You’re less likely to experiment, to think outside the box, or to try new approaches. Innovation requires a willingness to fail, to learn from mistakes, and to iterate. But as a perfectionist, the fear of failure can be paralysing, preventing you from taking the very risks that could lead to breakthroughs.
Procrastination
Ironically, perfectionists often struggle with procrastination. The fear of not being able to complete a task perfectly can lead to avoidance. You might delay starting a project because you’re waiting for the “perfect” conditions, or you might spend so much time planning that you never actually execute. I’ve found myself stuck in this loop more times than I care to admit – waiting for the perfect idea, the perfect moment, and ultimately, missing out on opportunities.
Strained Relationships
In a leadership role, perfectionism can strain relationships with your team. When you hold yourself to impossibly high standards, you’re likely to do the same to others. This can create an environment of constant pressure, where your team feels they can never measure up. Perfectionism can lead to micromanaging, which in turn erodes trust and inhibits your teams’ autonomy and growth.
Missed Opportunities
Perfectionists are often so focused on the details that they miss the bigger picture. You might spend so much time refining a report that you overlook the strategic implications or the opportunity to present it to key stakeholders. In my own experience, I often hesitated to take on new challenges because I didn’t feel “ready” or was afraid to fail. In retrospect, I see that my fixation on perfection was limiting my potential and slowing my career growth.
The Turning Point: Becoming a Recovering Perfectionist
Recognising the toll that perfectionism was taking on my life marked a significant turning point for me. It wasn’t an overnight realisation but rather a gradual awakening to the unsustainable nature of my pursuit of perfection. I started to question whether being more open to taking risks and letting go of the need to obsess over every detail might allow me to progress faster and find greater fulfilment in both my career and personal life.
The most significant shift came when I sought out coaching and embraced a change in mindset. Through coaching, I was able to gain a clearer understanding of the root causes of my perfectionism and develop strategies to manage it. This included setting realistic goals, celebrating small wins, and learning to be okay with “good enough” in situations where striving for perfection wasn’t necessary or practical.
Coaching also helped me challenge the underlying beliefs that had driven my perfectionism for so long. With guidance, I learned to reframe my thinking, shifting from a fixed mindset – where I believed my worth was tied to flawless performance – to a growth mindset, where I saw mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow. This shift was transformative, allowing me to approach my life and work with a new sense of freedom and creativity.
Embracing Imperfection as a Leader
As a leader, letting go of perfectionism is not just beneficial personally, but essential for the success and growth of your team. Here’s how embracing imperfection can transform your leadership approach:
Delegation and Trust
For a perfectionist leader, delegating tasks can be one of the hardest challenges. However, you cannot do everything alone. By learning to trust your team and delegate effectively, you can focus on more strategic initiatives. This shift not only reduces your workload but also empowers team members to take ownership of their work, fostering a more collaborative and innovative environment.
Encouraging a Growth Mindset
Perfectionism is often rooted in a fixed mindset – the belief that abilities are static and that failure reflects one's inherent worth. By embracing a growth mindset, you are able to view mistakes as opportunities for learning rather than as catastrophic failures. Encouraging this mindset within your team creates a culture where experimentation is valued and it’s safe to fail and learn, which drives continuous improvement and innovation.
Prioritising Impact Over Perfection
In today’s fast-paced business world, it’s crucial for leaders to prioritise impact over perfection. A leader who focuses on the outcomes that truly matter, rather than getting bogged down in minor details, sets a powerful example. This approach means delivering work that meets the needs of the moment, even if it’s not flawless. Understanding that sometimes “done” is better than “perfect” is key, especially when speed and agility are critical.
Leading by Example
As a recovering perfectionist, I can attest that leading by example can make a significant impact. By being open about your own struggles with perfectionism and the steps you’ve taken to overcome them, you can build stronger connections with your team. Demonstrating vulnerability and acknowledging imperfections helps create a more trusting and supportive environment, where balance and well-being are prioritised.
Fostering Innovation
Letting go of perfectionism allows leaders to cultivate a more innovative environment. When you’re not fixated on getting everything perfect, you increase your willingness to take calculated risks and encourage your team to do the same. This openness to experimentation and risk-taking can lead to creative solutions and new opportunities that might have been overlooked if you were still caught in a perfectionist mindset.
The Ongoing Journey
Letting go of perfectionism is not a one-time fix; it’s an ongoing journey. There are still moments when I catch myself slipping back into old habits, but I’m more aware now and better equipped to manage those tendencies. I’ve learned to recognise the signs – when I’m spending too much time on a minor detail, when I’m hesitant to delegate, or when I’m procrastinating because I don’t feel fully prepared.
In these moments, I remind myself of the benefits of imperfection – the freedom to be creative, the ability to take risks, and the opportunity to grow both personally and professionally. Coaching has played a crucial role in helping me stay on this path, providing me with tools and perspectives that have been invaluable in my journey towards success.
Embracing the Power of “Good Enough”
If you’re struggling with perfectionism, know that you’re not alone. It’s a common challenge, especially for those who are driven and ambitious. But it’s important to recognise that perfectionism, while seemingly a strength, can also be a significant barrier to your success and well-being.
By letting go of the need to be perfect, you open yourself up to new possibilities. You become more resilient, more innovative, and more effective as a leader. You also create a more positive and supportive work environment, where your team feels empowered to take risks, learn from mistakes, and grow.
So, embrace the power of “good enough.” It doesn’t mean settling for mediocrity; it means recognising that perfection is not always attainable or necessary. It means focusing on what truly matters and trusting in your ability to adapt, learn, and lead, imperfections and all.
Ultimately, it's not about striving for perfection – it's about embracing authenticity and growth. As a leader, your humanity is what truly drives success and inspires others.
Until next time!
Tania.